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spoonful_Fotor

We all have days when we feel a little less than awesome. We wonder if anyone is thinking about us. We might even feel alone. Maybe we are in an emotional funk and we don’t even know why. Maybe we blame winter. Long and gray days make it hard sometimes to find the sparkle of life.

As the new year beckoned, I had this incredible two-week window of confidence. I felt energized and ready to take the bull by the horns. I was going to do great things. I was going to write AMAZING blog posts and I was going to change the world.

I felt empowered and motivated and I really believed myself.

Then my inner critic took over. Doubt set up camp in my brain and drowned out all my positive thoughts with negative ones. I could not get a word on paper to save my life. I wanted to release something powerful and beautiful with words, yet I didn’t feel capable of powerful or beautiful.

So, I had a good cry. It’s what I do when I feel hopeless. Then I prayed for wisdom. I also prayed for friends who were dealing with struggles of their own.  “God, we all need some help here”.

You know what happened? Just as I was having a little pity party for myself, I opened my mail and discovered I had received a little package. My sweet and dear friend sent me a book. THIS book:

She…written by Kobi Yamada

She…written by Kobi Yamada

As I flipped through the pages, I read:

Do you see that? Affirmation. Love. Encouragement.

More pages became vitamins for my soul!  Acceptance. Support. Connection

I sobbed because THIS book and my beautiful friend, Dana, had reached right in and gave me new hope.  It was an instant love injection. Empowerment. Commitment. Courage.

I do not deserve this kind of love. And yet, He sends these living, breathing earthly angels to me time and time again. He gives me these incredible women, friends, family and a compassionate husband, all of whom breathe new life into me at just the right moments.  He answers in ways I just cannot fathom.  He whispers truth into my ear and propels me forward.

Last night, as I was still grappling with my purpose, He did it again.  Another longtime friend (my lovely Lisa–you can read all about her HERE) sent me a text and shared a loving act of kindness she and her son were going to provide to someone in need. She told me I had inspired that act. Me.  Me who messes up A LOT.  Me who didn’t think she could inspire a flea.  She can never know just how perfectly timed that little text affirmation was or how deeply she spoke love and hope into my soul.

Friends, never underestimate the power of prayer and the little acts of love you bestow on your friends and family. Maybe it was just a simple “I’m thinking of you” text.  Or, you remembered a family member’s birthday and sent them a card.  Maybe you just listened and gave of your time.  These acts may seem small in scale, but I assure you they are BIG in magnitude.  I believe if you just let go, just give up a little of your control (or a lot as the case may be), God will provide for you endless opportunities.  Maybe you are not a believer or you are uncomfortable with what you view as my “religious talk”.  That’s ok.  I was there too.  I spent many years sorting through what I believed or didn’t believe.   Sometimes I still do.  I’m just an ordinary woman who has made lots of mistakes.  I still make them and I don’t always get things right.  Yet, He loves me.  Perfectly imperfect me.   He’s proven this over and over and over.

If you are feeling alone, do not be afraid to reach out.  If you feel purpose-less, commit to just one act of kindness for someone else.  If you feel hopeless, pray.

Please let this serve as your heaping teaspoon of hope for today.  My gift to you.  My gift from my loving God.

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